I'm new to flash photography and found the instructions don't exist and googling didn't help. But I CAN attach the softbox to the stand, it just turned out to be more difficult than I expected and it didn't require an extra piece. It's possible that with frequent use the softbox will loosen up and be a little easier to put on the outer ring of the S-mount, I haven't been able to figure out how the gels attach to the flash yet. I know you can use the Velcro that came with it, but as I said, there were no instructions for this part.
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