I recently got a promotion, so I've decided to start washing towels and sheets to begin with. I've never washed them to save pennies, you know. So I decided to give it my all. I used them in the dryer and damn my towels are folded again! And my clothes weren't static anymore, I thought I had crappy superpowers that never evolved, but it turns out I shocked everyone, including my cats, because my fabric needed something to lubricate the threads from friction and generate static electricity. My cats are no longer afraid of my weeks of high-powered sparking in their little noses. And now that my sheets are unrolled on the right side of the bed, I can invite my girlfriend over. With this awesome job I can even hire a girl!
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